No. Not at all. Two people were in love. That introverted, problem-solving man saw an irreconcilable conflict in the relationship.

I can’t speak to the author’s relationship. Maybe there was no effort made to bring those conflicts to a resolution between them. Or maybe she didn’t see the problems in the same light as he did. But he was conflicted, or he wouldn’t have bailed. Doesn’t mean he didn’t love her. Or that he would forget her. The complete severing of the relationship is the quickest way to heal. I wish that weren’t so, but from everything I’ve seen, drawing it out just prolongs the pain.

People want different things in life. Sometimes there’s just no way to resolve those differences. I’ve tried, several times. It has always come down to “her way” or no way. After my wife died I decided that if there wasn’t an acceptable “our way” in future relationships then I wasn’t going to stick around and make two people regret their decisions. Because eventually, if one person isn’t getting what they need, that’s what always happens.

Grief is the price we pay for love. In EVERY case. If you love someone, you will HURT eventually. They leave or they die. There is no other alternative. Choose who you love wisely and savor every good moment. It always ends.

Written by

father, motorcyclist, old retired guy who’s just a little lost on a blue marble corkscrewing its way to oblivion

Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store